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I was going to write about something else today -- I have a couple of big-concept posts I've been meaning to write up and get around to -- but, heck, the last post I put up was a big-concept post so I figured let's have a quick breather from that and get something a little lighter up first. I've been all too guilty of this myself -- sending super-long messages.This topic came up as I got to an email from a reader. And what I found was that I was often disappointed -- I'd put all this time and effort into a monster of a message, and then... There are a bunch of lessons I eventually took away from those experiences that I'll share with you today.If you want to get someone's attention, you need your initial email to really standout. All you're trying to do in this first email is arouse someone's curiosity and get him or her to respond.2. I will get to some sample emails, but before I do, let's look at a few, simple guidelines to help you write that irresistible introductory email to the potential future love of your life:1. I don't usually start off a post with the impact points right at the beginning.But I want to lay these out first -- because they're so vital to solid message writing -- and we'll get into the "whys" and the "hows" in a moment.Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone.So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating.
I take every girl that I email as an individual, I try to personalise each message as much as I can.After all, you want to date a woman who has a sense of humor, too! although I will agree that some people like to have a conversation lead with questions, some of us feel as if we are under the microscope if too many questions are asked... Ive found it really difficult to get that balance in my messages. It's hard because I am a young guy, and the women I email are predominantly under the age of 22. What worked fairly well for me, during times I was "seeking" were to do a 4 step approach. only email those with whom there is a "loose connection", from either her being in my "viewed me", having added me to her favorites list, or seeing her post in some of the same threads that I do. Read her profile thoroughly, and look for points of common interest or similarities, as well as interesting things about her in her profile, that raise real areas of natural curiosity. The most important part of first emails, in my experience, has been to be a real person, writing to another real person, and to leave "results"(aka getting a date) until you've talked a bit, and see if there is a natural flow to communication. Don't compliment her on her looks and nothing else. However, have good clear positive pics and be attractive to her. Write an e-mail not too long and not three words long letting her know you've read what she wrote and give her something to respond to.4. Do you mean that certain obvious topics, have been discussed previously in these forums? Conversation should flow naturally, effortlessly... Sometimes I feel like Ive asked too many questions....sometimes I havent asked enough. It's really hard to find something that appeals to younger women...I get the feeling from responses on these forums that humour is a good way to break the ice....luckily i have a good sense of humour lol Thanks for the responses Something on the order of : Hi my name is______ I was going thru your profile and saw that you like___________,that is so cool I really like__________ too. If someone can meake me laugh on the first message, I will reply no matter what even if I'm not interested. As I said before, if I guy can make me laugh in the morning with my coffee, I always respond - whether he's somebody I'm really interested in or not. Have an interesting informative profile with your pics so that she can find out what she needs to know about you should she be interested.5. Have a thick skin and realize if they aren't interested after all that, there's nothing you can do but move on. and it's possible to search for existing threads on those topics???? The most common question we receive from men is how to write a good online dating first email.Only a small percentage of emails that are sent by men are ever opened by women. What if, out of that crowd of cows, one of them was bright purple?